2022.02.22 Journal

* Day six of journaling about Pride/Scorn/Demanding
* Social health – Hang out with friends in person.

* Meditation – Day 715
* Journaling – Day 57
* Yoga – Day 57
* Cold shower – Day 30

reflections:: 8pm. I’m glad that I continue making my morning routine happen regardless of the fact that I might meetings that make it challenging for me to prioritize also having introspective journaling time.

The next phase after this one is Courage/ Affirmation/ Feasible. And it’ll be interesting to explore how Pride/Scorn/Demanding leads to that. I’ve been reflecting on how I could have pride that leads to being demanding in different times of the day and that’s made me a bit more compassionate and patient than I’d have otherwise been. I wish I were more introspective at the moment, but I’ve had to stay focused on the fund-raise and haven’t made time. Simultaneously, random personnel issues keep cropping up that result in minor fire-drills each time. I feel fortunate those are occurring, as I literally signed up for this sort of stress. It will be extremely satisfying when I close a deal for the next round of funding or sell the company and this stress shifts to a new form. I see myself being demanding of my team, but that doesn’t necessarily lead to scorn. Sometimes what occurs is I just feel compassion when my demands don’t get met, but I definitely see how it can lead to scorn. I also see how pride leads to being demanding though. When I have some sort of attachment to an outcome, or feel like some sort of outcome defines me, then my ego expands to include it. And when that happens, I have demands of those around me so that I can meet the expectations I’ve set up for this thing occurring.

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