2022.02.06 Journal

* 30 minutes on the programming tutorial
* Day six of journaling about Desire/ Craving/ Disappointing
* Call a friend to catch up

* Meditation – Day 699
* Journaling – Day 42
* Yoga – Day 41
* Cold shower – Day 14

reflections:: 10:20am I intended to go to sleep last night, but ended up sleeping from 7pm – 4am instead. After waking up I saw a tv series, and did my AM ritual, which I’m closing out now with journal writing. It was rejuvenating to sleep so much. That said, I’m still sleepy and could use even more sleep. Is that a craving or desire? How disappointed to I feel that I’m still sleepy? Really force this. What do I feel disappointment around? Let’s fast rapid fire off a bullet point list.

  • I’m disappointed that I’m not in better shape
  • I’m disappointed that I don’t have a larger family where I have kids
  • I’m disappointed that I don’t spend more time with the family that I have
  • I’m disappointed that I didn’t learn how to feel my emotions sooner
  • I’m disappointed that I’m a little sleepy
  • I’m disappointed that I didn’t do a better job of staying in touch with people from my past
  • I’m disappointed that I haven’t shown up better for people in my life
  • I’m disappointed that I don’t throw a regular event that I invite people to

OK, so that was a useful first pass. And I’m sure that these are surface ones that I can dive deeper into. What can I learn from these? Well, one thing is that when I journal on a Sunday, I’m mostly focused on family. Meanwhile, when I journal on weekdays I’m mostly focused on work. Also I clearly need to do more to proactively address social life related issues. Took a break from journaling to reach out to a friend and say hi to him. We’ll likely hang out this afternoon now. Will also make a couple other calls. Just called my sister for example. Glad to know that getting in touch with desires lets me know my values.

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